Thanks for a wonderful birthday. Thanks, as always, for loving me and showing me such thought and care. Thanks for these four wonderful kids. Thanks for doing your best to get along with my mom. Thanks for this quiet life in the country in a spot that I never want to leave.
Birthdays are wonderful opportunities to celebrate life. I'm so grateful for mine. It is definitely tough and heartbreaking sometimes (and more than sometimes lately) but those difficult moments make the lovely ones that much more beautiful. And there are so many good, breathtaking moments. Ones where I laugh so hard I'm crying, or take in the glistening water and setting sun at Lodi Point, or eat bittersweet ice cream or mushrooms or discover some good butternut squash recipes, or snuggle in with my fluffy cat, or welcome my kids home off the bus, or see you walk through the door after a long day apart. And honestly, the tough times wouldn't be so hard if I hadn't first experienced ease and let my heart love deeply. I wouldn't still feel so much grief in missing my grandpa seven years later if I hadn't first loved him so much. Same goes for my dad. That doesn't mean it's not worth the initial love, I don't think. It's just something to come to terms with, I guess. Sometimes it's easy to be so preoccupied with what is lost or lacking that I fail to fully appreciate that which I do have. It's a human thing. But I'm getting better at choosing gratitude. I'm grateful that I had a grandpa who I could love. I'm grateful for so many memories of him. I have an amazing dad. He's taught me so much and is such an example to me. He gave me a good life, a magical childhood, and so many good times to remember. I'm grateful for him.
So 33. We should gets goats. If we went on vacation, I think we could get someone to take care of the goats at our house or theirs. I bet Josh would do it. Or Tony. Or Ron. Or even Wayne Nyre. But anyway we should certainly hold off on making such a decision until we hear favorable news from Reuben. (Fingers crossed).
I love you, Boy. I hope you always know it and feel it. You are the best part of my life. You are my favorite thing. You are my closest friend. I just don't know how I'd live without you. So please keep on staying forever.
Lady
